His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
