wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
