its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
