Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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