TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
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is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
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Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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