What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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