i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming