Whod you bang
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
