I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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