im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar