I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.