My brain says no but my pants say off.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
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We talked him into tasing himself.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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