Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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