remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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