making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
