I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
