Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
