How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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