he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
