my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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