Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
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I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
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Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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