he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
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