Duck Duck Cougar?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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