i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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