Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.