Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Never underestimate the power of titties
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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