I got chris browned last night
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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