So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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