We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
