I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
