i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
