Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Never let your siblings swipe right.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize