Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize