Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
