My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
