he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
