I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
