Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
