ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize