Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
