fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
