Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
