You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i need an iv and a liver transplant
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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