so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
