God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
