i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
