it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
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