That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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