Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
