he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm sobbing to NWA
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
