Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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