Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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