dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize